The Idiocy that is Naruto
by saturday101
Summary: Naruto stumbles upon a new jutsu and being the idiot that he is, ends up having to redo his life from his genin days. That's it, stop reading, JUST HURRY UP AND CLICK THE STORY ALREADY! Old story; pretty much discontinued; remembering that this exists makes me want to puke. Not being deleted for historical documentation (or something).
1. Prologue

25 years ago the Yondaime Hokage saved Konoha from the Kyuubi by sealing it in his newborn son Naruto, though he died in the process. Naruto faced many hardships during his life whether it was the villagers hate, which went away when he was 16, or facing the Akatsuki. Nevertheless he plowed through them with a cheerful smile and a bowl of Rame. Now Naruto, as the Rokudaime Hokage, is stronger and smar-

"Hm, wonder what this jutsu does, eh I'll try it. Time Reversal Jutsu!"

Er…maybe not.

**And there you have it! Give pairing suggestions etc. R and R!**


	2. Chapter 1 Where the heck are we?

**Arisa;** **Hey guys thanks to all of you who reviewed! I don't know how much I'll be able to update but I'll try my best. Now Naruto, the Disclaimer!**

**Naruto; Arisa-chan does not own **_**Naruto, **_**thank goodness for that.**

**Arisa; What was that?**

**Naruto; Nothing!**

**Sasuke; Idiot.**

**Arisa; *growls* Sasuke…**

_Ngh, what happened? _Naruto opened his eyes and looked around the room. _What? My old apartment? I haven't been here since Nagato destroyed Konoha! Hm, maybe Fuzz-butt knows what happened. To my mindscape! _Then he went, well, into his mindscape like he said.

As he made his way to the "Great" Kyuubi no Kitsune, he thought about what was going on.

"Let's see…maybe I'll have pork Ramen, or maybe I'll stick to Miso, ooh or maybe…"

Um, never mind. Anyway he finally made it to Kyu's cage.

"Yo Fuzzy-chan!" Naruto yelled, "Where the heck are we?"

**Arisa; *sigh* Another shortie, sorry but I'll try to make it up to you. But honestly yesterday was pretty good, I mean 3 stories up in the three days we've had an account! And I'm updating the only one that needs updating a day after! BTW, Will and I may appear, even though she doesn't watch and/or read it.**

**Naruto; Hey, I'm not that much of an idiot! And what was up with you growling at Sasuke earlier?**

**Arisa; Frankly, I hate him. To all you Sasuke fans, don't worry I won't kill him off, I'll probably just turn him good just for you guys! Oh and there'll be no bashing in this fic…except for Orocimaru, Kabuto, and the Sound 4, and that excludes Kimimaro. Oh yeah and Shukaku A.K.A the drunk Tanuki/Raccoon/1 Tailed Beast.**

**To Mika Achizume; Thank you so much for being the first reviewer! And also for subscribing!**

**To animesam; Thank you for subscribing also! You guys are way too nice to me**

**Arisa out.**


	3. Chapter 2 We meet Team 7, again

**Arisa; Yo! Alright, so I tried to make this chapter longer as a reward to all those who reviewed. The less you review the more short chapters will come. I'd also like to promote William's story about the Titanic, you can find it on our profile, there will be 3 stories on the Titanic, click on anyone it's the same story. It's poetry, and if you don't like poetry I still advise you to read it 'cuz I don't usually like poetry either. Now Kyuu-kun the disclaimer! (What I actually like him.)**

**Kyuubi; Arisa does not own **_**Naruto**_**.**

**Arisa; SO CUTE!**

Normal; BELIEVE IT!

Kyuubi talking; **"BELIEVE IT!**

Thoughts; _BELIEVE IT!_

Naruto to Kyuubi; ~BELIEVE IT!~

Kyuubi to Naruto; **-BELIEVE IT!-**

Speech; "BELIEVE IT!"

Time difference; _**BELIEVE IT!**_

Last time;

"_Yo Fuzzy-chan!" Naruto yelled, "Where the heck are we?"_

fIsHcAkEfIsHcAkE

"**Brat, you're an idiot you did a jutsu and you didn't look what it does?" **Kyuubi yelled.

Naruto shrugged, "Well sorry!"

"***sigh* well I guess it's not your fault you're an idiot. Oh well, and as for where we are I thought'd be obvious, we're in the past kit!" **he said. **"Geez, Rokudaime and he can't even look at his physical body. As for when we are, well my guess is right after you beat Mizuki, and why are you even here idiot you could've asked without coming all the way here!"**

"…oh yeah, well I guess I'll go then…Talk to you later!" and with that he opened his eyes. _Huh so right after I beat Mizuki…aw man! I have to win the respect of everyone again! Well as long as I'm here I might as well change some stuff. I should probably make a list of what I want to change._

While he was thinking this he got dressed and looked at the clock, "Oh crap, I'm late!" and he ran off to go to the Academy.

As soon as he went into the door Iruka yelled at him, "Naruto! You're late! I'd give you a detention but since you're graduating I can't."

Naruto laughed nervously, "Ehehehe, sorry but I…um…saw a black cat and I had to go the long way around…"

"Idiot!" Sakura yelled when he sat down, "Why are you even here this is for graduates only!"

"Actually, Naruto passed by taking a 'make-up' test last night" Iruka cut in.

Meanwhile, Naruto was staring at Sakura, _Hey Kyuubi remind me again why I had a crush on her._

_**Because you were a bigger idiot then you are now.**_

_Hey!_

"Oi Naruto!" Iruka called, "Pay attention!"

"Huh? Oh sorry I guess I zoned out for a sec." Naruto looked around the room, "Oh its Hinata! Hi Hinata-chan!" You all can guess what happened next.

**Thud**

_N-naruto-kun is t-talking to me! _

_Oops, guess she hasn't gained her confidence yet… _Naruto thought sheepishly.

Iruka sighed, "Anyway, as I was saying your teams will have three people and a Jonin…" Naruto tuned this all out as he had heard it before. "…Team 7" here Naruto paid attention, "will be Naruto Uzumaki, Sakura Haruno, and Sasuke Uchiha."

Then Sakura went fangirl screaming "Love prevails!"

_**2 hours later**_

"Naruto knock it off!" she screamed, for Naruto was singing. It wasn't that he was a bad singer, surprisingly he was wonderful it was what he was singing.

"_song that never ends, yes it goes on and on my friends, some people started singing it not knowing what it was and they'll continue singing it forever just because, this is the…"_ Yes, Naruto Uzumaki Namikaze, son of the Yondaime, future Rokudaime Hokage, was singing the Song that Never Ends. **(A/N; sorry just had to put that idea came from a different author who I can't remember the name of.)**

Kakashi then decided to poke his fuzzy head into the room.

"You're late!" cried Sakura.

Kakashi stared at them, "My first impression of you guys…you're annoying. Meet me on the roof in 5 minutes." And with that he flickered out of the room.

_**5 minutes later**_**(think of the SpongeBob time skip voice)**

"Alright, let's introduce ourselves, say your name, likes, dislikes, hobbies, and dream for the future."

"Why don't you start sensei?" Sakura said/asked.

"Okay my name is-"

"Kakashi Hatake," Naruto interrupted, "also known as Copy Cat Kakashi and Sharingan Kakashi, formally of Anbu, likes are the Make-out series, dogs, talking to the memorial stone, and being late, dislikes people who abandon their teammates for a mission, not wearing his mask, that his team is dead, and having his book stolen from him, hobbies are reading the Make-out series, buying them, talking to the memorial stone, and being late, his dream for the future is anyone's guess." Everyone stared at him. "What I wanted to know what our sensei was like and he probably would've given us an answer that told us nothing but his name anyway!"

"…Okay then, Pinkie you go."

"A-alright, um, my likes are…" here she looked at Sasuke and blushed, " my hobbies are…" she did the same thing as before, "my dream is…" here she blushed and squealed, "AND I HATE INO-PIG AND NARUTO!"

_Great a fangirl, _thought Kakashi,"Eyesore you up,"

"It's not my fault the stores won't sell me anything that doesn't say 'kill me' all over it," Naruto muttered, "Eh, oh, um, my name is Naruto Uzumaki," _Namikaze _"um I like Ramen and foxes, I hate traitors, snakes and the three minutes it take for ramen to cook, my hobbies are training, drawing, and _beating up perverts,_ my dream for the future is, well, one's an ambition which I need to kill two people before they hurt my precious people, and my dreams are to become Rokudaime Hokage, have the entire village respect me, and to marry Hinata-chan. Ooh and to have a bridge named after me!"

_Well looks like that Naruto is an interesting one, foxes are obviously the Kyuubi, though I don't know why he likes it, snakes are probably Orochimaru, which makes me wonder where he heard of him. He wants to kill somebody which is more in the Sasuke range, I understand why he wants to be respected but why Rokudaime, why not Godaime? He beats up perverts? Isn't this the kid who created the Sexy Jutsu? I don't get why he wants to marry Hinata Hyuuga either, he never really noticed her before, and why the heck does he want to have a bridge named after him! "_Brooder, go."

"My name is Sasuke Uchiha, I have few likes and many dislikes, and my dream is not a dream but an ambition, to kill a certain man."

Here are the various responses given to that.

_Predictable._

_He's so cool!_

"No! Bad Sasuke bad! No taking revenge on family! Bad boy!"

I'll assume you know which one is which. Oh and Naruto got a glare from Sasuke and a punch from Sakura.

"Alright tomorrow is your genin test-"

"Uh Kakashi-sensei, we already took the test."

"This is the real test, now there's only a 66% chance you'll pass and only nine out of 27 will become genin. Meet me at training ground 13 at 8:00, don't be late." He started walking away, "Oh and don't eat breakfast, you'll only get sick."

_**30 minutes later**_

In Naruto's apartment he made a list of what he was going to change. I looked kind of like this;

**Things I'll change**

_Haku and Zabuza's death_

_Possibly have Haku join Konoha_

_Obliviousness to Hinata-chan_

_Prevent Sasuke's betrayal_

_Prevent Pervy Sage's death_

_Prevent Asuma's death_

_Prevent Itachi's death_

_Prevent Destruction of Konoha_

_~Hm that's all I can think of, Kyuubi can you think of anything else?~ _Naruto asked.

_**-You should probably prevent the loss of Shukaku and stop Danzou from becoming Hokage, even though it was only temporary.-**_

_~Oh yeah, thanks Kyuu!~ _he…said as he wrote that stuff down. After he was finished with that he went to bed.

_**The next morning**_

We find Naruto making his usual breakfast of cup Ramen, oh, I'm sorry I meant his 12th cup, my mistake. Yep, this time he's totally disregarding Kakashi-sensei's "advice", he suggested this idea to his teammates but unfortunately they didn't listen. This is a great example on how the SasuSaku pair have zero respect for him, this is a sad day for Team 7 indeed.

**Here, hope it's long enough for you. Thank you to all of you who subscribed and/or reviewed, you inspired me so much! Flames are accepted but if they swear they will be used to make Sasuke soup. I'm sorry if anyone is ooc but I haven't seen the regular (meaning not Shippuden) series in awhile and I can't check it on Netflix 'cuz they only have the subbed version, which annoys me. Oh yeah before I forget if my story resembles anyone else's, which it probably does, I'm sorry that was not my intention and I will say where I got the idea and credit it to you for the ones I know, if you tell me I'll put your acknowledgement in the next chapter. Give me any suggestions on pairings you want and the most requested will be voted on. NaruHina is staying though. R/R! **


	4. Chapter 3 Genin Test part 1

**Arisa; Hello people of Earth, Mars, and Venus! Here is today's episode of The Idiocy that is Naruto. For those of you who actually read this, you have my respect. Now! William! The disclaimer! By the way don't call her Will or Willa, she gets ticked off.**

**William; Arisa doesn't own Naruto and has made this up for your amusement. I hope you are amused by this story.**

Normal; BELIEVE IT!

Kyuubi talking; **"BELIEVE IT!**

Thoughts; _BELIEVE IT!_

Naruto to Kyuubi; ~BELEIVE IT!~

Kyuubi to Naruto; **-BELIEVE IT!-**

Speech; "BELIEVE IT!"

Time difference; _**BELIEVE IT!**_

Previously on Naruto (think Avatar)

_We find Naruto making his usual breakfast of cup Ramen, oh, I'm sorry I meant his 12__th__ cup, my mistake. Yep, this time he's totally disregarding Kakashi-sensei's "advice", he suggested this idea to his teammates but unfortunately they didn't listen. This is a great example on how the SasuSaku pair have zero respect for him, this is a sad day for Team 7 indeed._

fIsHcAkEfIsHcAkE

When Naruto got to the training ground…he got a beating from Sakura for being an hour late, at least she didn't have her past/future strength. Then, instead of doing nothing like before, Naruto set to drawing, be glad it's drawing and not something perverted.

_**1 hour later**_

"Morning everyone, ready for your first day?" Kakashi said appearing seemingly out of nowhere.

"YOU'RE LATE!" shrieked the banshee, I mean Sakura, who didn't notice she was the only one who said it.

"Look Kaka-sensei!" Naruto yelled. "It's Sasuke, the Emo Piggy!"

"Ah, sorry, but a black cat crossed my path and I had to go the long way around. Oh and wonderful picture Naruto, it actually looks like Sasuke." Was Kakashi's lame excuse and comment on Naruto's picture. He then produced an alarm clock from who-knows-where. "Alright, you have until noon to get these bells", which he brought from his pocket.

"But sensei," exclaimed Sakura, "there's only two bells!"

"Ah that's because then at least one person would fail. If you fail to get the bells you'll be tied up to those posts,' here he gestured to three wooden stumps, "and watch as I eat in front of you…oh yeah and you'll also be sent back to the academy."

The responses where as thus;

_So that's why he didn't want us to eat breakfast, _ deadpanned the SasuSaku duo.

"No problem! I had breakfast this morning!" …do you really need me to tell you who this is?

At this Kakashi raised an eyebrow, "Naruto, you went against my orders?"

He (meaning Naruto) scratched the back of his head sheepishly, "Well it wasn't really an order sensei, more like advice…"

"*sigh* Never mind, we'll start when I say 'Go'. Oh yeah and if you don't come after me with the intent to kill you'll never pass."

If you have seen/read the anime/manga you, which you probably have, you know that Sakura semi-freaks out and Sasuke was scoffing. So while they were doing that, Naruto was sharpening his kunai while humming 'Parallel Hearts' **(theme from Pandora Hearts, look it up on grooveshark if you really want to) **and Kakashi couldn't help but think that Naruto was at least slightly sadistic.

**Arisa;…looks like it's gonna be two parts anyway. Oh well, I need one of you (or a couple of you) to give me your opinions on some ideas for the next part, so I won't be able to do the next chapter until I get responses, Just PM me or review and tell me you want to help.**

**Sakura; I thought you were only going to bash the Sound 4, Kabuto, and the Snake-**

**Arisa; Don't you dare finish that sentence, yes that was the plan. Sorry but it just kinda came out, don't worry it'll stop…sometime.**

**Thank you to TREX19990, FuujinNoKitsune, True. Oblivion, redslovelyangel, animegirl03, Daughter of Demeter and happycheese for subscribing.**

**ruhiko; Thank you! I'm glad you think it's funny!**

**hater 4 life; Thank you so much! Without you telling me that website I wouldn't have been able to write this chapter!**

**Mika Achizume; Of course you need to be thanked! You guys are way too nice to me!**

**By the way how do you get a beta reader?**

**Arisa out.**


	5. Chapter 4 Genin Test part 2

**Arisa; Yo! What's up! Here is the newest installment of The Idiocy That is Naruto! Thank you for being patient, now that school is here I probably won't be able to work on it as much but please bear with me. Thank you Kenta Raikiri for being my beta. Now! Naruto the disclaimer!**

**Naruto; Hey, I already did it! Have Sasuke do it!**

**Sasuke; Hn, Idiot.**

**Arisa; Never mind! I'll do it! *sigh* if I owned Naruto do ya really think I'd be writing fan fiction?**

Normal; BELIEVE IT!

Kyuubi talking; **"BELIEVE IT!"**

Thoughts; '_BELIEVE IT!_

Naruto to Kyuubi; ~BELIEVE IT!~

Kyuubi to Naruto; **-BELIEVE IT!-**

Speech; "BELIEVE IT!"

Time difference; _**BELIEVE IT!**_

Previously on Naruto (think Avatar)

"_Naruto, you went against my orders?"_

_He (meaning Naruto) scratched the back of his head sheepishly, "Well it wasn't really an order sensei, more like advice…"_

"_*sigh* Never mind, we'll start when I say 'Go'. Oh yeah and if you don't come after me with the intent to kill you'll never pass."_

_If you have seen/read the anime/manga you, which you probably have, you know that Sakura semi-freaks out and Sasuke was scoffing. So while they were doing that, Naruto was sharpening his kunai while humming 'Parallel Hearts'__and Kakashi couldn't help but think that Naruto was at least slightly sadistic._

fIsHcAkEfIsHcAkE

While Kakashi was explaining the test, Naruto was planning, yes my friends, he was _ planning, _whether he was doing a good job or not is all up to you.

_Hm, since I know the purpose of the test I might as well tell the others, _he thought. Suddenly he grinned, _I'll finally be able to get revenge on Kakashi-sensei! Oh great I'm starting to sound like Sasuke._ Meanwhile Kakashi saw Naruto's grin and started to worry over his own safety.

"A-alright, begin when I say-"

"When you say 'go', yeah we know you told us," grumbled Naruto. And then…he threw a kunai. Yep it sounds anti-climatic but this was no ordinary kunai, no, it was one of the Fourth's special three-pronged kunai! *pause for gasps* Yes, Naruto brought one, how did he get it you ask? Simple, he told the Third about knowing who his dad was, yadda yadda yadda, etc. putting two and two together etc. the fox…oh wait…never mind about that last part. Here's a flashback for those of you who didn't get any of that.

_Flashback_

_Hiruzen Sarutobi was sitting at his desk being tortured, or as normal people call it; paperwork, when Naruto came in._

_"Hey Old Man!" Naruto shouted._

_The Hokage laughed, happy to get away from his work, " Hello Naruto, you haven't come by like this in awhile."_

_"I know! I should be coming more often, you need breaks too! Maybe we can go for ramen in a minute!" Naruto grinned, after all ramen solves just about everything._

_"Perhaps, though I sense you didn't just come to visit me."_

_Naruto's grin got wider, "You know me so well Old Man! Anyway, yeah, I was kind of wondering, since Kakashi-sensei is giving us the genin test tomorrow, that I could...get one of my dad's kunai?"_

_Hiruzen was shocked, so shocked, his pipe fell out of his mouth, his eyes bulged, and he nearly fell out of his chair. How the heck did Naruto know who his dad was?_

_"I simply put two and two together, it's actually really obvious when you think about it, I'm honestly surprised that no one else has figured it out yet!"_

_"Um, o-okay, let me get it and then we'll go out for ramen, how does that sound? Oh, and remember not to tell anyone who your father is, not yet at least"_

_Flashback end_

Anyway when Naruto threw the kunai, Kakashi of course caught it (duh!), but when he saw what kind it was, he was shocked to say the least. However, he didn't react the way I wanted him to, unfortunately, for he only widened his eyes.

_What the! One of sensei's special kunai? How is it here? More importantly, why does Naruto have one? I'm going to have to talk to him soon, _Kakashi thought. "Don't be so impatient. I haven't even said 'go'. Now, go!" and with that he poofed out and the genins scattered. Well, except for Naruto.

_If I were a lazy perverted sensei, _Naruto thought, _where would I be…eh probably doing something to Sasuke or Sakura. Dang that sounded wrong!_ Then he began his sensei hunt.

Meanwhile Naruto was right, after he put Sakura in a genjutsu, Sasuke attacked Kakashi and was rewarded with A Thousand Years of Death.

_Now,_ Kakashi thought, _where is Naruto…? _Scanning the area he found that he couldn't sense Naruto's chakra so he went to look for him, and found him sitting in a meditational stance…while singing.

"_This one's 'bout a dream, I had last night. How and old man tracked me home and stepped inside. Put his foot inside the door, and gave a crooked smile, somethin' in eyes, somethin' in his laugh, somethin' in his voice made my skin crawl off…"_ sang Naruto.

Now Kakashi knew that Naruto was a good singer, he just had never seen or heard him singing a song that was serious, so he was honestly surprised. Suddenly he stopped, then he grinned, "I sense you Kakashi-sensei," then he attacked. "A Thousand Years of Death!" Kakashi's eyes bulged, _ Did he see me do that to Sasuke and copy me? How did he sense me anyway? _he wondered while he substituted away. As soon as Naruto saw that Kakashi had substituted, he stopped, "Sensei! You almost made me Thousand Years o' Death to The Log! You are so lucky I didn't hit it!" what Naruto is that The Log hadn't been honored as Holy yet so needless to say, Kakashi was confused (cornfused). After Kakashi got over his shock, he threw a kunai at Naruto, and 'Naruto' dispelled.

_Crap_, Kakashi thought, _where's the real Naruto?_

So while the clone was keeping Kakashi busy, the real Naruto had found Sakura, tied her up so he wouldn't get punched later, and dragged her to Sasuke. Then he dug up Sasuke with two more Shadow Clones.

"Sasuke? Sasuke!" Sakura screamed, "I thought Kakashi-sensei had killed you, oh I'm sorry for doubting you!"

"Um guys, I think we should work together to get the bells." Naruto said, saving Sasuke from being "hugged" by Sakura.

"Hn," Sasuke grunted, "Idiot, why would we work together for something you're probably going to fail anyway?"

"Yeah Naruto! Sasuke doesn't need help from a dead last" Sakura yelled, "You probably just want _his _help!"

"That's just it," Naruto said completely ignoring Sakura, "why would there only be two bells if you're supposed to have three-man teams? He's obviously trying to separate us and its _working!_ If that doesn't convince you then I'll even give my bell to one of you two if we work together."

"Hn, fine." And since Sasuke agreed, do did Sakura.

_***chibi Naruto* "BELIEVE IT!"**_

_Where is that kid? _That kid was obviously Naruto. Suddenly he sensed a chakra signature. _Aha! There he is! Wait… _the person that came out was not Naruto, nor Sasuke, but Sakura. _…Why is Sakura attacking me?_ Kakashi wondered, then his eyes widened, _Oh crap!_

"Wind Style; Wind Ropes!" Naruto yelled.

_Great, _Kakashi groaned_, I can't move…_

"That's because Wind Ropes are basically invisible ropes, hence the name 'Wind ropes'. Now eat this! A Thousand Years of Death!"

"Oh," Kakashi said weakly, "so that's what it feels like…I never knew it was this uncomfortable to be poked in the butt..."

After that he was released and while Sasuke kept him busy, Naruto stole the bells, gave one to Sakura and threw the other to Sasuke.

"Very nice guys," Kakashi golf-clapped, "I'm happy to say that you all passed."

"Wait sensei," Sakura said, "Naruto doesn't have a bell, so how did he pass?"

"Well that's because the point of the test was teamwork." Kakashi turned serious, "People who break the rules are, but you know what? People who abandon their friends to follow the rules are worse than trash. Keep that in mind you guys. Alright, meet me at the memorial stone in five minutes."

_**5 minutes later**_

"Okay, this stone here is for remembering heroes. However to get on this stone you have to be killed-in-action." Kakashi spoke.

Sakura gasped, "K-killed?"

He nodded, "Yes, killed, but don't worry, you probably won't be in danger of that until at least a B-rank. Tomorrow we start missions." Naruto groaned much to everyone's surprise, "Um, anyway meet me here at 9:oo a.m., don't be late."

**Arisa; Hey, I missed you guys! First order of business, Wind Ropes goes to Namikaze Artemis, thank you for letting me use your Justus by the way. Check out her Fanfic; Uchiha Obito, Ghost! It's really awesome. The song Naruto was singing was 'Faust, Midas, and Myself' by Switchfoot, in case you wanted to know.**

**Thank you to TigerlillianBJWI550, druneko, sparton2, Nightshadegirl, and Poke Fan4444 for subscribing, oh and if I didn't get your name right I'm sorry but my handwriting is kinda hard to read, even for me.**

**MillionDollarNinja; I was going to fail Team 7, but I decided not to, just for you! Oh, and by fail I mean fail, then pass… Hope you were satisfied with the chapter**

**The DragonBard; Thank you for giving your opinion, I'm trying really hard and this is the first fanfiction I've written as a fanfiction, the other stuff is by William, stuff from Creative Writing last year, and one is a story my friends and I (including William) made up.**

**Noname; don't apologize, everyone is entitled to their own opinion, remember guys, I'm trying! So if the chapter is too short, it's because of lack of inspiration, also 'cause it looks a lot longer on paper and in word.**

**Mika Achizume; I'm so glad those parts made you laugh! I personally don't think I have that great of a sense of humor but I absolutely love to make people laugh!**

**Kenta Raikiri; Again, thanks for betaing my story, I'm always up for some advice! Oh and check out…his(?) story Redo, it's awesome and worthy of many reviews and cookies.**

**R/R!**

**Arisa out.**


	6. Omake! The Piano

Team 7 was riding in a truck with Kakashi driving (don't ask). When they had finally made it to their destination, Naruto had almost died of boredom.

"Finally!" Naruto yelled, "Let's get this dumb D-rank over already!" Needless to say…he got punched, and then he saw the massive staircase and looked at his sensei.

Kakashi shrugged, "The piano must go up," and with that he drove away.

Naruto, Sasuke, and Sakura decided to push it up, made it halfway to the top, then the piano fell, and Sakura gave up. The boys looked at each other and sighed.

"The piano must go up," Naruto shrugged, uncannily resembling Kakashi.

The boys started pushing/pulling the piano, with Naruto pulling and Sasuke pushing. They made it a quarter of the way, and then…the piano fell on Sasuke, pushing him down, then he gave up.

Naruto went down, looked at the SasuSaku duo, looked at the stairs and said determinedly, "The piano must go up!"

He tried tying it around him, but only made it two steps up. When he looked down, Sasuke and Sakura were eating dango, still he kept on, this time pushing. An hour later he had finally made it up, then Hinata Hyuga came out and smiled.

When Kakashi came back he saw Sasuke and Sakura asleep and Naruto coming down the stairs with a lipstick mark on his cheek. On the way back Naruto was in the truck with Kakashi, and Sasuke and Sakura were in the back, again.

When Naruto went back in time, however, he was smarter and used shadow clones…and came back with more than just one lipstick mark.


	7. Chapter 5 Stupid Chapter Titles!

**Arisa; I'm baaa-aack, did you miss me? By the way I used an overly dubbed manga for this so if there's any mistakes…sorry. Now Itachi?**

**Itachi; If you're looking for a disclaimer, look in the earlier chapters. **

**Arisa; Aieeee! How could anyone think you're evil!**

Normal; BELEIVE IT!

Kyuubi talking; **"BELEIVE IT!"**

Thoughts; '_BELEIVE IT!_

Naruto to Kyuubi; ~BELEIVE IT!~

Kyuubi to Naruto; **-BEELIVE IT!-**

Speech; "BELEIVE IT!"

Time difference; _**BELEIVE IT!**_

Previously on Naruto (think Avatar)_._

"_Okay, this stone here is for remembering heroes. However to get on this stone you have to be killed-in-action." Kakashi spoke._

_Sakura gasped, "K-killed?"_

_He nodded, "Yes, killed, but don't worry, you probably won't be in danger of that until at least a B-rank. Tomorrow we start missions." Naruto groaned much to everyone's surprise, "Um, anyway meet me here at 9:oo a.m., don't be late."_

_**fIsHcAkEfIsHcAkE**_

The woods are silent, the only noise are the trees in the wind.

"Sakura to Kakashi, I'm in position."

"What about the others?"

"I'm in position."

"As am I!" Naruto said in a perfect imitation of Lee.

Kakashi chuckled, "How far away is the target?"

"Five meters and closing."

"Alright, go!"

Naruto silently pounced onto the target, surprising everyone, "Gotcha!"

Sasuke smirked, "Target confirmed."

"Good! Mission; Find Tora (again) is accomplished!" said Kakashi eye-smiling.

_**5 Minutes Later**_

"MRROWWW!"

"Poor Tora…good little kitty-kitty…I was so worried about you I could have died!"

…Um…oh! Uh, Team 7 was in the assignment room and have given back Tora to Lady Shigimi, wife of the Fire Daimyo, who was tortur-I mean hugging her cat.

Sakura thought, '_With that to look forward to can you blame her for running away?'_

'_Compared to her kittens, Tora is a God send,' _Naruto sighed.

Sarutobi cleared his throught, "Now the next assignment for Team 7 will be…to babysit for the council of elders…to run errands to the neighboring village…to help dig sweet potatoes-"

"MROO-OWWW!"

"Tora!"

"…or catch Tora, again."

Naruto mentally smirked, '_Time to launch Operation; Get rid of the dumb missions,'_ he frowned, "Oi, Old Man! We're tired of D-ranks, Give us something exciting, fun, or challenging! I know we're only Genin but we should be getting C-ranks too!"

The response were thus;

'…_He's got a point.'_

'_Oh, he's such a pain!'_

'_*sigh* Be grateful for what you can get!'_

You should be able to tell who said what but if you can't they were Sasuke, Sakura, and Kakashi respectively.

"You have made a reasonable argument…"Sarutobi started to explain how mission are assigned, but Naruto tuned it out because he had heard it all before (and because the authoress was too lazy). Then the Third smiled, "Since you have made a good point I will allow you to go on a C-rank usually reserved for Chunin…the protection of a certain individual. Send him in!"

Naruto smiled, mission success, "All right!"

The door creaked open and out walked an older man with a sake bottle in his hand. "This is my protection? They look like a bunch of snot-nosed brats! Especially…the midget. He's got the face of an imbecile. It's a joke right? You kids aren't really ninja, are you?"

Naruto twitched, "I will not kill the client, I will not kill the client, I will _not_ kill the client…"

"I'm Tazuna, famous bridge builder…until we're safely in my own country, where I'll be completing my next bridge, you'll all be expected to protect me…even if it costs you your lives!" …Do I really need to tell you who that was?

_**1 hour later**_

"All right! Road trip!"

Sakura frowned, "What are you babbling about Naruto?

"This is the first time I've ever been out of the village!" Naruto grinned, looking around.

Tazuna frowned, "Am I really expected to place my life in the hands of this idiot?"

"Don't worry, I'm a jonin and I'll be going too," said Kakashi.

"Don't ever underestimate me! I'm the best, one day I'm going to be Rokudaime one day, so remember the name Naruto Uzumaki!" Naruto inwardly smirked, '_Mission success, I think Kakashi-sensei was getting too suspicious.'_

"Respect you? I don't think so," insulted Tazuna, "Not even if you do become Hokage."

"Grrrrrr…"

"Um, Mr. Tazuna? You come from the Land of Waves right?" asked Sakura.

"What of it?"

She (Sakura) frowned, "Kakashi-sensei are there ninja in that country too?"

"No. Not in the Land if Waves…" started Kakashi, however Naruto tuned him out and started a plan to save Haku and maybe Zabuza, but you don't get to know it yet. He then tuned back in when Sakura squealed about how amazing the Hokage is etc. etc.

"You obviously don't think so," Kakasi smiled, "There's nothing to worry about."

As they passed a puddle Naruto smirked, '_Well…I was going to pee in it, but…I guess I have mercy, _this _time."_

Two figures rose up from the depths of a…rather shallow puddle, which makes no sense if you think about it and dang it I'm spazzing again.

Anyway they wrapped a chain around Kakashi-sensei and tightened slightly.

"What!"

"One little piggy," taunted one of the demons. Kakashi was basically cut up into a bunch of pieces with a lot of blood and guts.

"Sensei!"

**Arisa; I have this poll going and only one person has voted in it! I need to know if Naruto should actually reveal himself as a time traveler to anyone, and most of these reviews were for the last actual chapter, not the omake.**

**FallenBleedingAngel; First off, cool name, second, I'm glad you like it! I hope this chapter satisfies you.**

**Mika Achizume; It's official, you're one of the most awesomest people in the entire world!**

**A special shout out to ChevalierSilencieux who I have down for a reviewer but can't find the review in my mess of an inbox.**

**And thanks to imcwnl, ManxomeFoe, doremishine itsuko, GhostSniper907, Olblackbird, JP Gosick, TheShyQuietGirl, ninjaunicorn98, drake-dragon-101, Miranda Gryffindor, and slln for subscribing, alerting, etc. (P.S. if I got any of your names wrong, I'm sorry but my handwriting is getting worse I think.)**

**Now click the bright yellow button! You know you want to! **

**Arisa out.**


	8. Omake II! How to be home for Christmas

**Arisa; Merry Christmas to you all! Today is the day the Lord's Son Jesus came down as a newborn baby. For those of you who dislike acts of God in public, don't read it, or better yet, read it and ask more about it.**

"**It was about one week until Christmas Day, and everyone in Konoha was excited, well…except for some people who shall not be named."**

Naruto looked around, "Do you hear something?"

"**Aw crap, uh, I mean…"** Aw crap.

Gaara looked at him, "I believe it was an authoress mutilating the forth wall."

"Uh, what?"

"Nothing, what are you doing the Hyuga's place anyway?" asked Gaara.

Naruto blushed, "Um…nothing." Gaara being Gaara he just assumed it was thus and left. Naruto sighed, _'Whatever happened to…oh yeah, time travel.'_

**-Brat, what are you complaining about now?- **rumbled the Nine Tailed Fox.

The Rokudame started walking home, ~Nothing Kyuu, I was just missing my family, that's all.~

The Kyubi chuckled, **-Missing your family huh? Why, you can just go and walk to their houses, not like they died…most of them anyway-**

~It's not the same, they're not the same people as in the future, Sakura is still a fangirl, Gaara still has to deal with Subaku, Sai is who knows where, Shikamaru isn't smoking (even though that's a good thing), Hinata still gets nervous when she's near me, Ino is…um…a…bad word…~

**-A bad word, really?-**

~I have a two year old give me a break! ~ He sighed, ~My kid doesn't even exist yet. ~

**-Fine to get you to stop complaining I'll tell you how to get back.- **The demon smiled,** -Temporarily mind you, but you'll be able to see your family again. So all you have to do is write a parody of a famous Christmas song, from now, from the future…doesn't really matter, however it does actually have to fit together.-**

Naruto walked into his house, got a pen and some paper, and sat at his desk. ~Sounds simple enough, thanks Kyuu! ~

**-Just consider it an early Christmas present. –**

_**12 hours and 15 pages later**_

"Man, this is harder than I thought. Well, there's no shame in asking for help!" He shouted cheerfully.

He walked outside, walked to the park and spotted Shino.

"'Morning Shino!" smiled Naruto.

Shino walked over, "Good morning." Naruto noticed that he (Shino) had something in his hand.

"What'cha got there?"

"A wasp and a bee, however the wasp is dead and someone stepped on the bee. I was looking for a place to bury them," he said solemnly.

Naruto blinked, "Which Hokage do you respect the most? Don't ask it'll make sense in a second."

"…The Fourth…"

Naruto grinned, "'Kay follow me." He lead Shino to the Hokage Monument, right above the Yondime's head and started digging with his hands, "Alright, bury them right there, and then you'll have to do whatever you do for bug funerals."

It was done.

"Hey, I'm having a Christmas party here on Friday, so I was wondering if you could come, you don't have to tell me or not, it's just come if you want, you can bring family or friends too."

Shino gave one of his very, and I do stress very, rare smiles, "Thank you Naruto Uzumaki," then he walked away.

"No Shino," Naruto said quietly, "thank _you_ for helping me, even if you don't know you did."

Suddenly Sasuke appeared with two tied up shinobi, "Naruto, take these to the Hokage will ya." Then he headed home.

"Sasuke! I'm having a Christmas party on Friday, if you want to come, just show up!" Sasuke grunted, showing that he had heard Naruto."

He (Naruto) dragged the kidnapped guys to Tsunade. "Hey, Grandma Tsunade! Sasuke wanted me to bring these guys to you."

"Hm? Oh, right, just leave them on the couch." She looked up, "Ah, Naruto? Can you do me a favor? Anko is bringing two new ANBU and I have to run out for a bit…"

"Sure!" Naruto smiled, "Just leave it to me!"

"Thanks kid," Tsunade said gratefully.

After she had left, Naruto looked over at her desk and sighed, '_It looks like it got hit with a tornado.' _He walked over and started straightening it up, after he finished Anko came in with a blonde and a black haired girl.

Anko blinked, "Eh? Where's the Hokage?"

"She stepped out for a bit, until then, I guess you're stuck with me," grinned Naruto.

"Alright…" she went over to the couch, moved the two hostages (you forgot about them didn't ya?) and sat down. "Oh, um, these two are Wolf and Tiger."

Wolf took off her mask revealing silver-green eyes, "Anko, I'll never be able to make friends outside of ANBU if you introduce me like that! Besides he seems trustworthy." She turned to Naruto, "Sorry about that, my name's Arisa Sakimoto."

"Naruto Uzumaki, believe it!" he grinned.

"My name is Will Parker," Said Tiger as she took off her mask revealing bluish-greenish-grayish eyes. At Naruto's strange look she explained, "My parents were foreigners. They died during the Kyubi attack."

Arisa frowned at Naruto's sad look, "Liar, you're parents are in Shanghai! Stop teasing him!"

"Ah, sorry Naruto, couldn't resist." She said laughing, "Yeah my parents are travelers, but when we moved here we stayed so long I just became a shinobi, then my parents said it was time to leave again so I just stayed here."

"Its fine, you were just kidding around. So I'm having a Christmas party on Friday, so I was wondering if you guys could come. You too Anko," added Naruto, "If you can/want to just show up."

"Does that apply to me too?" asked the Slug Princess walking in.

Naruto grinned, "Yep, it wouldn't be much of a party without my friends there."

"You think of us as friends?" she was answered with a nod, "Aw! Group hug!" Will said hugging him, Arisa seconds after. Five seconds later Will sighed, "Well, better get to work," they put their masks back on.

"It was nice meeting you, see you on Friday!" called Arisa.

After the duo of girls, and Anko, left Iruka came in, "Ah Naruto, there you are, I figured you'd be here since you weren't at the Monument or at Icharus."

"Iruka-sensei! Can we get ramen after you're done? Please?" pleaded the fishcake storm.

"Sure," smiled Iruka, "I just came in to see if you were here so we can go now."

Naruto cheered, "Awesome! Thanks sensei!"

After they ate (Naruto only ate five bowls so there wasn't a huge bill), Iruka was updated on Naruto's life, and was invited to the party. Naruto headed towards the Memorial Stone.

Sure enough, just as Naruto thought Kakashi was there reading his Make-out Paradise with six other volumes next to him.

"Sensei! I thought you'd be here! I came to invite you to my Christmas party on Friday!" Naruto yelled, "If you want to come, just show up, and could you tell Sakura that she can come too? I can't find her."

Kakashi looked up, "Alright." He stood up and disappeared in to leaves.

"Aw man, he forgot his books, well, I guess I'll take them to his house then…" suddenly he notice someone standing behind the stone, "Eh? Pervy Sage?"

"Hm? Oh hey brat."

Naruto walked over, "Can you do me a favor and take these books to Kakashi-sensei's house, I don't know where he lives."

"Alright," Jiraya stood up and summoned four frogs, er, toads. "Okay boys, deliver these to Kakashi's house." The toads hopped away singing Christmas carols.

Naruto face-palmed, "Pervy Sage…ugh, anyway I was wondering if you could go to my Christmas party on Friday, just show up if you want to come," he called walking away.

When Naruto reached the training field, for that was where he was going, he spotted Itachi Uchiha lying in the grass, then he got up and lit seven trees on fire with the fireball jutsu, after that he lay back down.

After Naruto was sure Itachi was asleep he snuck quietly to where he was and laid a present and a card next to him, then he walked away.

Itachi opened an eye as the blonde faded into the trees, '_Another one? Geez first that Wolf girl then him? Oh well.' _ He opened the present, it was a set of engraved kunai that said, "_Being courageous is not to be without fear, it is overcoming your fears to protect the ones you love." _The card said; "Merry Christmas Itachi, I hope you have a happy New Year as well.

Naruto Uzumaki."

_Back with Naruto_

'_Hope he likes them,'_ thought Naruto walking towards the Yamanaka flower shop, then he spotted the Sand Sibs, "Hey Gaara, Kankuro, Temari, what's up?"

"Hey Naruto," grinned Kankuro, "I'm trying to find someone to burn these but I can't seem to find anyone who can or will." He said holding up eight puppet heads.

Naruto smiled cheerfully, "Just leave it to me! Oh and I'm having a Christmas party on Friday, if you want to you guys can come."

"Thanks Naruto!"

Suddenly Naruto noticed that they had left something, he went over to it and picked it up, "To Naruto, from Gaara…yes idiot you open it now." He smiled, "Well that was nice of him!"

He opened up the package and found ten glass figurines in the shape of demonic horses, he smiled and put them in his bag.

Naruto started for the flower shop again…then he saw Kiba trying to throw senbon…and failing nine times, so Naruto decided to run instead of just walking to escape impalement.

Entering the shop, Naruto headed straight towards the blue orchids, he picked a couple and headed to Ino to pay for them.

"Naruto?" Ino blinked in surprise, "What are you doing here?"

He smiled, "I'm getting some flowers for Hinata, I heard these were her favorite."

"Aw, that's sweet," She said wrapping them up, "That'll be five dollars."

He handed over the money, "Do you have a tag I can put on them?" Ino nodded and handed one to him, "Thanks. Oh and I'm having a Christmas party on Friday, if you want to you can come, could you pass the message to rest of the rookie nine?"

"Sure!" she said handing over the flowers and 11 rather ugly sweaters. At Naruto's confused look she explained, "They're your Christmas present, after all everyone should have an ugly Christmas sweater." Naruto thanked her and headed out.

He walked to the Hyuga compound while writing on the card, he walked to the door of Hinata's house, put the flowers down, knocked and headed home.

When Hinata opened the door she wasn't expecting to find her favorite flowers on the doorstep, much less being invited to a Christmas party. She read the note.

"_Dear Hinata,_

_I heard you liked this kind of flower so I decided to get you some, I hope you like them. I'm having a Christmas party on Friday so if you could come that'd be great._

_Naruto"_

Hinata was so surprised she almost fainted, she went inside and put the flowers in some water and sat down.

_Back with Naruto_

He was heading home when suddenly Tsunade crashed into him holding 12 tied up people, or more like two people with five clones each.

"Can you watch these two er, 12, thanks," she said hurriedly and ran away. What she forgot to mention is that they were all drunk and ninjas so…just picture that for a second.

*Pause for reader to regain composer*

…Alright, now the two guys were the hostages that Sasuke captured earlier, somehow they got a hold of some sake from Tsunade's stash and were doing ninjutsu…while drunk. Erm, needless to say, Naruto dragged them to the Hokage Tower so fast people wondered if the Yellow Flash came back to life.

The days before Friday were filled with buying presents, food, and decorations, but at long last Friday had come.

Naruto is famed as the best party host in Konoha in the future, he always makes sure that the guests are having a good time, even Sasuke had to admit that he did. So imagine the guests' reactions when they saw the top of the Hokage Monument. Amazing, no?

"Hey Arisa, Will," greeted Naruto as the approached, "glad you could come!"

They smiled, "This place looks amazing!" exclaimed Arisa, "Oh, this is our friend Jaclyn."

Jaclyn smiled, "Merry Christmas!"

"Merry Christmas to you too, so how's it going?"

"Fine," answered Will, "but man, the other ANBU are brutal! They made us do 100 push-ups and then called it 'warming up', can you believe it?"

Naruto grimaced, "Oh, ew, that sounds like a Guy/ Lee thing…" They all shuddered at that thought.

When all the guests were there Naruto got everyone's attention, "Thanks for coming guys. All right, because of a bet I had with a friend I have to sing a parody of a Christmas carol, the lyrics are not supposed to offend anyone but if they do I apologize in advance. Ahem…

_On the first day of Christmas Shino gave to me, a dead wasp and a squashed bee, _here he was silent for a moment in remembrance, then he continued,

_On the second day of Christmas Sasuke gave to me, two kidnapped guys and a dead wasp and a squashed bee, _(Sasuke; Hn…)

_On the third day of Christmas Tsunade gave to me, three kick-butt ladies, two kidnapped guys, and a dead wasp and a squashed bee,_ (Anko, Arisa, and Will; Heck yeah!)

_On the fourth day of Christmas a toad man gave to me, four singing frogs, three kick-butt ladies, two kidnapped guys, and a dead wasp and a squashed bee, _(Jiraya; they're _TOADS!)_

_On the fifth day of Christmas Iruka gave to me, FIVE RAMEN BOWLS, four singing frogs, three kick-butt ladies, two kidnapped guys, and a dead wasp and a squashed bee,_

_On the sixth day of Christmas a scarecrow gave to me, six pervy books, FIVE RAMEN BOWLS, four singing frogs, three kick-butt ladies, two kidnapped guys and a dead wasp and a squashed bee, _(Kakashi received several glares)

_On the seventh day of Christmas a weasel gave to me, seven flaming trees, six pervy books, FIVE RAMEN BOWLS, four singing frogs, three kick-butt ladies, two kidnapped guys and a dead wasp and a squashed bee, _(in the shadows of the trees Itachi smiled)

_On the eight day of Christmas Kankuro gave to me, eight puppet heads, seven flaming trees, six pervy books, FIVE RAMEN BOWLS, four singing frogs, three kick-butt ladies, two kidnapped guys, and a dead wasp and a squashed bee,_

_On the ninth day of Christmas Kiba gave to me, nine epic fails, eight puppet heads, seven flaming trees, six pervy books, FIVE RAMEN BOWLS, four singing frogs, three kick-butt ladies, two kidnapped guys, and a dead wasp and a squashed bee, _(Kiba; Heh heh, you saw that?)

_On the tenth day of Christmas Gaara gave to me, ten demon horses, nine epic fails, eight puppet heads, seven flaming trees, six pervy books, FIVE RAMEN BOWLS, four singing frogs, three kick-butt ladies, two kidnapped guys, and a dead wasp and a squashed bee. _(Gaara smiled and everyone else thought he meant _real_ demon horses)

_On the eleventh day of Christmas Ino gave to me eleven ugly sweaters, ten demon horses, nine epic fails, eight puppet heads, seven flaming trees, six pervy books, FIVE RAMEN BOWLS, four singing frogs, three kick-butt ladies 2 kidnapped guys, and a dead wasp and a squashed bee, _(Ino grinned and everybody else thought she was insane)

_On the twelfth day of Christmas a 'Kage gave to me, twelve loony ninjas, eleven ugly sweaters, ten demon horses, nine epic fails, eight puppet heads, seven flaming trees, six pervy books, FIVE RAMEN BOWLS, four singing frogs, three kick-butt ladies, two kidnapped guys, and a dead wasp and a squashed bee._

By the third verse, basically everyone was laughing so hard they started to turn blue.

An hour later all the guests were partying the night away, the only ones who weren't dancing, eating, and/or socializing were Arisa and Naruto.

"Hey, what's wrong?" she asked suddenly.

Naruto looked up in surprise, "Arisa? When did you get here?"

"20 minutes ago," she said impatiently, "so I'll ask again, _what's wrong?"_

"Nothing, why would you think that?" he asked nervously. Suddenly they both were in his mindscape. "Wah? What the heck Kyu?" at this time he noticed Arisa next to him, "Ah! Arisa how are you in my mind!"

She ignored his exclamation and turned to Kyubi, "Alright I'm here, thanks for doing that for me."

"**We have a deal then?"** the fox demon rumbled.

"We had a deal when you told me he wanted to see his family again," Arisa smiled, "because it was so honorable, I've decided to let him see them both."

"Wait a minute, what the heck is going on here?" shouted Naruto.

"You're going back to the future Ramen Head, only 'til the day after New Year's though."

He blinked, "How can you do that?"

Arisa grinned, "In the wise words of a white pork bun; It's. A. Secret."

"That's so unfair!" grumbled the fishcake.

"How?" she giggled, "You get to see your family again, for over a week I might add, isn't that fair enough?"

"…Good point," Naruto mumbled.

"Glad to see we're on the same page, now as soon as I leave your mindscape you'll be there, alright?" with that she left and Naruto vanished.

_At the Namikaze home_

Hinata smiled down at the little girl on her lap, "Have you told Santa what you want for Christmas yet?"

The little girl looked up, "Uh-huh, I told Santa that I wanted Daddy to come home, at least for one day," she said.

Hinata smiled sadly, "We'll see Kushina, now, off to bed, the faster you get to sleep the faster Santa comes."

"Okay Mommy! Night-night!"

After Kushina went to bed, Hinata heard a knock at the door, '_Now who would visit at this hour?' _she wondered as she opened the door. When she opened the door she gasped, "Naruto!"

Said blonde grinned, "Merry Christmas."

**Sakura; Is an omake supposed to be longer then an actual chapter?**

**Arisa; Nope! But whatever, Merry Christmas!**

**Itachi and Sasuke; Happy New Year!**

**Anko and Kakashi; Happy Hanukah!**

**Will and Jess; Happy Kwanzaa!**

**Naruto; Happy Holi-**

**Arisa; *tackling him* No! The use of "Happy Holidays" is forbidden!**

**Naruto; Why?**

**Arisa; I'll show you *dragging him off***

**Jaclyn****; If you're wondering why Arisa hates the use of "Happy Holidays" look up Christmas with a Capital 'C' by Go Fish**

**Arisa; *pops up out of nowhere* Listen to it all! Do not stop listening after five seconds!**

**R/R**

**Arisa out.**


	9. Chapter 6 The affects of a Fever kinda

**Arisa;*bouncing up on the vowels* **_**A**_**bcd**_**E**_**fgh**_**I**_**jklmn**_**O**_**pqrst**_**U**_**vwx**_**Y**_**z. *looks up* Er…I wasn't doing anything! No I'm not dead, ask anyone I reviewed for. Anyway, Mr. Bunny?**

**Mr. Bunny; *twitches nose and makes bunny sound***

**Arisa; …um yeah, that was the disclaimer…I think…**

Normal; BELEIVE IT!

Kyuubi talking; **"BELEIVE IT!"**

Thoughts; '_BELEIVE IT!_

Naruto to Kyuubi; ~BELEIVE IT!~

Kyuubi to Naruto; **-BELIVE IT!-**

Speech; "BELEIVE IT!"

Time difference; _**BELEIVE IT!**_

Previously on Naruto (think Avatar)_._

_Two figures rose up from the depths of a…rather shallow puddle, which makes no sense if you think about it and dang it I'm spazzing again._

_Anyway they wrapped a chain around Kakashi-sensei and tightened slightly._

"_What!"_

"_One little piggy," taunted one of the demons. Kakashi was basically cut up into a bunch of pieces with a lot of blood and guts._

"_Sensei!" _

_**FiShCaKeFiShCaKe**_

The demons appeared behind Naruto, "Two little pigg-"

Naruto punched them in the face, "Would you just shut up already?" he asked annoyed.

Blood flowed from one of the demon's noses and dripped from his mask. "I'm going to kill that little brat!" he spat.

Naruto sneered, "You were going to try anyway idiot."

Sasuke took this time to throw a shuriken at the duo. It caught on their chain, pinning them to a tree, then he threw a kunai into the middle of the shuriken.

Naruto scrunched up his face, '_Don't think dirty thoughts, don't think dirty thoughts, __**DO NOT THINK DIRTY THOUGHTS!**__' _He thought as he jumped on one of the demon's shoulders.

The duo released their chains and threw the boys off of them. They split up, one heading towards Naruto the other heading towards Tazuna.

'_I've got to do something, I've got to!' _Sakura thought. She jumped in front of the bridge builder, "Stand back, sir!"

As the demon got closer Sasuke jumped in front of Sakura. Suddenly the demon was pulled away by a "mysterious" force.

The demon that was still conscious thrashed around, trying to get free. The responses were as thus;

'_Kakashi-sensei…you're…alive!' _Sakura.

'_Humph…he had to butt in.' _Sasuke.

'_I'm not sure how they did it, but it looks like I've been saved!' _Sake Man! …Oops, I mean Tazuna.

"You better aside money for some saplings sensei! One sapling for every square inch!" …I really hope you know who said this but…it was Naruto.

Kakashi eye-smiled, "Good job guys, all three of you!"

"You okay Sakura?" Naruto asked.

She nodded, "Y-yeah, I'm fine, just a bit shaken."

Naruto smiled, "Understandable, hey, maybe Sasuke can take a page from your book and actually show some emotion!"

"Idiot, don't insult Sasuke!" Sakura screeched punching him.

"Ow! Hey, I was just kidding! Ow!" he ran behind Sasuke, "Please protect me."

"Hn," grunted Sasuke.

_Meanwhile…IN THE TOOLSHED! __**(A/n No idea where that came from)**_

"Do stop whining. There's nothing to worry about. I, with this neck – cleaving knife…will take the hit by myself." Zabuza said calmly.

Two other figures trembled, "…Yes sir…but are you sure you really want to?" one of them asked nervously.

"The enemy has hired ninjas of tremendous skill! And besides…" gulped the other, "Now that the Demon Brothers have tried and failed, they'll be on guard against further attempts."

"Remember who you're talking to!" growled the masked ninja (no not Kakashi), "I am Zabuza Momochi, the Demon of the Mist!"

_Back with the Kakashi gang_

"Ah! I said I was sorry!"

"Naruto you idiot! Get back here so I can kill you!"

"Oh yeah, like that's going to get me to go over there!"

Tazuna approached Kakashi, "…Kakashi- sensei sir…I…have something I need to say…About the request for help I made to your village…As you guessed, this job is more dangerous then you and your students were led to believe. There's a real scary man who wants to see me dead."

Kakashi raised an eyebrow, "A "real scary" man…?"

"He's a billionaire in the field of marine transportation," explained Tazuna. "His name is Gato!"

"Wait, wait, wait," Naruto interrupted, startling them, "A guy whose name means "cat" wants to kill you?"

Kakashi sighed, "Cat? No, Gato of Gato Shipping and Transport. Also known as the richest man in the world, _that _Gato."

"That's the one," nodded Tazuna. "On the surface, he looks like a legitimate businessman. The truth is he's a ruthless, murdering criminal who employs gangs and teams of shinobi, and traffics in drugs and contraband." He shook his head, "He starts out taking over companies…and ends up running entire countries. He lives by every low and vicious trade known to man…"

Naruto tried to be polite and listen but…sadly we all know that he has the attention span of a fly to anything except for ramen and Hinata. As Tazuna ranted about what would happen Naruto interrupted, "Oi, first of all, the daughter thing won't work, if Kakashi-sensei is going to end up with anyone it's probably going to Anko. Second of all, as long as you grandson doesn't swear vengeance we're good, the last thing we need is a revenge obsessed kid on the loose *cough* Sasuke *cough*. Lastly we were going to help you anyway!"

"…okay then…"

_**Many minutes later**_

On a boat…"Wow, this is some fog. I can barely see a thing," Sakura exclaimed.

"We'll be able to see the bride in a minute," said the boat rower. "On the other side of it is the Land of the Waves." Team 7 watched silently as the bridge became visible.

"We'll be there soon!" Tazuna called as they approached a…um…what would you call it? Eh, I'll just call it a bridge.

"Tazuna…" said the rower, "so far it looks like we've been overlooked…Just to be on the same side we'll take an inland waterway through town to a point where we can make landfall under the cover of mangroves*.

"Thank you," Tazuna grunted gratefully.

Passing the trees, the boat stopped at an old dock and the team, plus Tazuna, stepped off.

"This is as far as I go," said the boatman, "Take care of yourself."

Tazuna smiled gratefully, "Thanks…for taking such a risk. I shouldn't have asked it." The man nodded and sped away. "Ok! Now if I can just make it home in one piece…"

"Yeah, yeah," grunted the Cyclops. '_There's bound to be another attack…and next time, they won't send chunin. We'll probably face jonin. Could this be any worse?' _

"Over there!" yelled our favorite orange ninja, throwing a shuriken.

Everyone gasped, startled, and Kakashi went over to check it out.

"Naruto look at what you did!" screamed Sakura.

Said blonde sighed, "…Snow hare…"

"He's right," said Kakashi, "but it's spring so why is it white?"

"Ooh! I know!" yelled Naruto, jumping up and down with his hand in the air, like he was in school, "Maybe he hid in the bushes so that he would stay white. O-or maybe he's albino! Let's keep him and name him Haku!"

Zabuza sweatdropped, _'From what I see…this group isn't equal in skill to the Demon Brothers.'_ He focused in on Kakashi, '_Yet their sensei is Kakashi of the Sharingan!'_

Insert random kunai attack. "You know," said Naruto casually, "If you're going to hide, at least pick a spot where you blend in."

Kakashi's eye widened, "Everyone, take cover!"

Zabuza threw his sword in a tornado…thing. It hit a tree and Zabuza stepped onto it.

"Well, well…If it isn't Zabuza Momochi, this kid who ran off and left the Land of Mist!" Kakashi put a hand to his forehead protector. "This may be a little rough."

"Kakashi of the Sharingan, I presume?" Zabuza smirked, "If it wouldn't be too much trouble…Could you surrender the old man?"

'_The Sharingan!' _Sasuke thought startled.

"Assume the manji battle formation! Protect Tazuna…all of you, stay out of the fight. That's the kind of teamwork this situation demands." Kakashi lifted his forehead protector, "And now…Zabuza shall we?" he said now showing Obito Uchiha's gift.

"…" Naruto was silent, remembering the story of how he got that eye.

Zabuza turned, "Ah…to face the Sharingan so early in our acquaintance…This _is_an honor…"

_Due to writers block the authoress has decided to stop it right here. Please enjoy this random short for your patience._

Naruto walks in holding a helium balloon. He pulls it down and sucks in the chipmunkifing gas. "_I think back to the time when my search first began. I left behind those shores of sand, for this everlasting world out there~. I know that with this burning passion driving me, someday, somewhere I'll finally see, the light I've searched for everywhere~," _he sang in a high voice.

_**NEXT!**_

Hinata enters looking nervous.

"You can do it!" cheered Sakura.

The Hyuga heiress took a deep breath, "I-I don't know…"

"Don't worry, we'll help you," said Tenten. The rest of the girls (Ino, Temari, Arisa, Will, and Jaclyn) voiced their agreement.

Hinata closed her eyes and nodded, "O-okay, ah, let's do it."

(_Hinata, __**Sakura, **__**Ino,**_Temari, _Arisa,_**Will,**** Jaclyn**)

**zenryoku zenkai II yukagen **  
><strong>zenryoku zenshin nuruma yukagen<strong>  
><span><strong>zenryoku zenkai II yukagen<strong>  
><strong>zensen zenshou II anbai<strong>**  
><strong> 

**All my power with a complete recovery**

**of health times two**  
><strong>All my power with a complete recovery rounded up<strong>  
><span><strong>All my power with a complete recovery of health times two<strong>  
><strong>A good fight and complete victory<strong> 

_kyou ha ichinichi HIMAKKUSU __  
><em>_ARE KORE shitakute mayocchau __  
><em>_oyasumi kibun no PURINSESU __  
><em>_kitsukeba yuugata DAMEKKUSU___

_I have free time the whole day I want so much, __  
><em>_I can't choose just one wish __  
><em>_I think I'm a PRINCESS on a holiday __  
><em>_When I realize the great afternoon, it's NO GOOD!___

kyou mo ashita mo HIMAKKUSU   
><span>gokazoku yonin de goippaku   
><span>EJIPUTO kidori de SUFINKUSU   
><span>AMERIKA kibun de TEKISASU

Plenty of free time today and tomorrow   
><span>Taking an overnight trip with the four of my family   
><span>Seeing a SPHYNX with the EGYPTIAN air   
><span>Then TEXAS with an AMERICAN feeling!

_**yoyuu SHAKUSHAKUPPE itsumo KURAKURA ZUBIZUBA **__**  
><strong>__**nigamushi hara no mushi mo CHORO CHORO to tettai shichau yo~!**__****_

_**Just be as cool as a cucumber and laidback all the time **__**  
><strong>__**Then bugs in your stomach bugging you will go off!**__****_

_**watashi ha URUTORA RIRAKKUSU **__**  
><strong>__**SUTEKI ni moteki na RIRAKKUSU **__**  
><strong>__**hito aji chigau ze DERAKKUSU **__**  
><strong>__**toccharakatte mo **__**  
><strong>__**yobarerya BABABABAAAN!**__****_

_**I'm ULTRA-RELAXED **__**  
><strong>__**BEAUTIFULLY, unbeatably RELAXED **__**  
><strong>__**Just a slightly odd DELUXE **__**  
><strong>__**Scatterbrained but **__**  
><strong>__**When you call me, "BAN BAN BAN BAN BANG!"**__****_

**watashi ha itsudemo RIRAKKUSU ****  
><strong>**WABISABI kikasete DERAKKUSU ****  
><strong>**BIKKARI! KIKKARI! saeteru ****  
><strong>**ATAMA PII! PII! ****  
><strong>**watashi no KOTO dake mitete ne!******

**I'm always RELAXED ****  
><strong>**WABI-SABI seasoned DELUXE ****  
><strong>**Bright! Clear-Headed! ****  
><strong>**Brainy! BEEP! BEEP! ****  
><strong>**Look at no one but me!******

_kyou ha ichinichi HIMAKKUSU __  
><span>__ryouri ni CHARENJI sorette NAISU! __  
><span>__onabe de KAREE ga kusatteru __  
><span>__nioi o kaitara U~N DERISHASU___

_I have free time the whole day __  
><span>__A cooking CHALLENGE-That's NICE! __  
><span>__The curry in the pot is rotten __  
><span>__I should have smelled it. Mmm, _

_DELICIOUS!___

_kyou mo kyou to te HIMAKKUSU __  
><em>_ZUNTAKATATTAKA! ZUNTAKATATTAKA! okai MONO __  
><em>_gokinjosan ni nage KISS __  
><em>_ARIGATO kibun de GURASHIASU!___

_Today and today, I have free time __  
><em>_Ripping and running, I go happily shopping __  
><em>_I throw a KISS to my neighbours __  
><em>_Feeling full THANKS, I say GRACIOUS!___

yuto RYURYUPPE itsumo tehanesaki BIBINBA ZURAZURA   
><span>byoku no oni mo CHORO CHORO to tettai shichau yo~!

There's always plenty of time Chicken,

bibinba of Korea,   
><span>Demons with zurazura disease-They'll run away, yeah!

_**watashi ha URUTORA RIRAKKUSU **__**  
><strong>__**kanpeki de "UFUFU" na RIRAKKUSU **__**  
><strong>__**hyakusen renma no DERAKKUSU **__**  
><strong>__**okkana BEKKURI tobidete KUMA gorou!**__****_

_**I'm ULTRA-RELAXED **__**  
><strong>__**Perfect and hee-hee RELAX **__**  
><strong>__**Trained in 100 fighting games, DELUXE **__**  
><strong>__**Fearful, surprised, coming out, bear kid**__****_

**watashi no kimochi ha RIRAKKUSU ****  
><strong>**ori me ha KICCHI RISURAKKUSU ****  
><strong>**GAKKARI! KIKKARI! kieteru ATAMA PII! PII! ****  
><strong>**watashi no ii koto mitete ne!******

**My feelings are relax ****  
><strong>**Creased very well, slacks ****  
><strong>**Gattiri! Kittiri! My brain is clear, my head is BEEP BEEP! ****  
><strong>**Watch nobody but me!******

_**zenryoku zenkai II yukagen **__**  
><strong>__**zenryoku zenshin nuruma yukagen **__**  
><strong>__**zenryoku zenkai II yukagen **__**  
><strong>__**zensen zenshou II anbai**__****_

_**All my power with a complete recovery of health times two **__**  
><strong>__**All my power with a complete recovery rounded up **__**  
><strong>__**All my power with a complete recovery of health times two **__**  
><strong>__**A good fight and complete victory**__****_

_zenryoku zenkai II yukagen __  
><span>__zenryoku zenshin nuruma yukagen __  
><span>__zenryoku zenkai II yukagen __  
><span>__zensen zenshou___

_All my power with a complete recovery of health times two __  
><span>__All my power with a complete recovery rounded up __  
><span>__All my power with a complete recovery of health times two __  
><span>__A good fight and complete victory___

_**watashi ha URUTORA RIRAKKUSU **__**  
><strong>__**SUTEKI ni moteki na RIRAKKUSU **__**  
><strong>__**hito aji chigau ze DERAKKUSU **__**  
><strong>__** toccharakatte mo **__**  
><strong>__**yobarerya BABABABAAAN!**__****_

_**I'm ULTRA-RELAXED **__**  
><strong>__**BEAUTIFULLY, unbeatably RELAXED **__**  
><strong>__**Just a slightly odd DELUXE **__**  
><strong>__**Scatterbrained but **__**  
><strong>__**When you call me, "BAN BAN BAN BAN BANG!"**__****_

_watashi ha itsudemo RIRAKKUSU __  
><em>_WABISABI kikasete DERAKKUSU __  
><em>_BIKKARI! KIKKARI! saeteru ATAMA PII! PII! __  
><em>_watashi no KOTO dake mitete ne!___

_I'm always RELAXED __  
><em>_WABI-SABI seasoned DELUXE __  
><em>_Bright! Clear-Headed! __  
><em>_Brainy! BEEP! BEEP! __  
><em>_Look at no one but me!_

_**NEXT!**_

"Gaara, there's a dead person our house!" yelled Haku to his roommate. Yep, there sat Kabuto, just as dead as he could be.

Said raccoon-eyed kid looked over, "Oh, hey, how did he get there?"

Haku rolled his eyes, "Gaarrrra, what did you do?"

"Me? Ah, eh, I didn't do this," he stuttered.

"Explain what happened Gaara!"

The tanuki protested, "I've never seen him before in my life!"

"Why did you kill this person, Gaara?"

"I do not kill people," lied the redhead. "That is-that is my least favorite thing to do."

The…supposedly dead girly-looking boy glared at him, "Tell me Gaara, exactly what you were doing before I got home."

"Alright, well, I-I was upstairs…"

"'Kay."

"I was-I was sitting in my room…"

"Yes."

"…Reading a book…"

"Go on."

"And, well this guy came in…"

"Okay."

"So I went up to him…"

"Yes."

"And I uh, well, I stabbed him thirty-seven times in the chest," admitted the psychopath who is Gaara.

"…Gaaaaarrrrra, that kills people!" Haku yelled.

"Oh, ah, wow, uh, I didn't know that."

"How would you not know that?"

"Yeah I'm in the wrong here. I suck," confessed the Shukaku jinjuriki .

Haku looked down, "What happened to his hands?"

"What's that?"

"His hands, wh-why are they missing?" Haku asked, not sure he wanted to know the answer.

Gaara hesitated, "Well I, uh, kind of uh, cooked them up, and ate them."

O.o "…Gaaaarra!"

"I was hungry and, well, when you crave hands that's…"

Haku turned slightly green, "Why would you do that?"

"I was hungry for hands! Give me a break!"

"Gaaaarra!"

"My stomach was making the rumblies…"

"Gaara!"

"…that only hands would satisfy."

Uh-oh, irritated Haku, "What is wrong with you, Gaara?"

Many, many things…but said psychopath only said, "Well I-I kill people and I eat hands, that's two things."

_To be continued…_

***Mangroves; Tropical evergreens that grow along the shorelines and river banks and look like floating forests when the tide is high.**

!

**Arisa; Alright guys, so…still not getting many people vote in the poll, but then again you guys don't read this do you?**

**Itachi; What the heck was that?**

**Arisa; That, my friend, is the affect of watching youtube combined with a fever. Wilf (WriterFreak101) seems to have passed the curse on to me. Anyway, review responses!**

**FallenBleedingAngel; Here ya go! Um…sorry about not updating sooner! …What does FBA mean? **

**luckyschoolgirl; Thank you, thank you, thank you!**

**shadowmarialove; Don't worry, I will!**

**Kakashi3000; Thanks!**

**A special shout out to Inuyonas who I have down for a reviewer but can't find the review in my mess of an inbox, I really need to work on that.**

**And thanks to shadowfox2345, ChwilioAmRhywbeth, UNTensaZangetsu, Contagious Daydream, ShineseAce, Freedom its218, and redsun 13 for subscribing, alerting, etc. (P.S. I'm really sorry if I got any of your names wrong!)**

***Ahem* Review, review, review, review, review, review, review, review, review, review, review, review, review, revi-**

**Itachi; *knocks Arisa out with a leek* Just review already and spare us the pain of her saying that until she passes out**

**Arisa out.**


	10. Chapter 7 Insert chapter title here

**Arisa; Six months of not updating...I'm really sorry you guys...Anyway, Conner?**

**Conner; Arisa does not own Naruto, but if she did, she'd still be writing this...**

Normal; BELIEVE IT!

Kyuubi talking; **"BELIEVE IT!"**

Thoughts; '_BELIEVE IT!_

Naruto to Kyuubi; ~ BELIEVE IT!~

Kyuubi to Naruto; **-BELIEVE IT!-**

Speech; "BELIEVE IT!"

Time difference; _**BELIEVE IT!**_

Previously on Naruto (think Avatar)_._

"_Assume the manji battle formation! Protect Tazuna…all of you, stay out of the fight. That's the kind of teamwork this situation demands." Kakashi lifted his forehead protector, "And now…Zabuza shall we?" he said now showing Obito Uchiha's gift._

"…" _Naruto was silent, remembering the story of how he got that eye and what became of the giver._

_Zabuza turned, "Ah…to face the Sharingan so early in our acquaintance…This is __an honor…"_

_**fIsHcAkEfIsHcAkE**_

"Not everyone knows what the Sharingan is! Jeez, no consideration for the rest of us…" Naruto grumbled.

"…Shinobi who have the Sharingan have mastered a form of ninjutsu," explained Sasuke, "which enables them to penetrate and see through any illusions…and to reflect the power of the genjutsu back on those who cast them. And there's more…"

"Heh-heh…exactly," the Demon of the Mist chuckled. "There is indeed more. Most formidable of all is the acuity with which the Sharingan…"

"Can discern and duplicate blah blah skill." Naruto huffed, "Jeez, we might be Genins but we're not stupid! Do you think we don't know Kakashi-sensei is known as the Copy Cat Ninja or whatever? The guy who copied over a thousand jutsus? We weren't born yesterday!"

"…"

"…"

"Enough." Zabuza finally said, breaking the silence. "As…_pleasant_ as this conversation has been…the time for talk is over. I'm on a very tight schedule to polish off the old man."

Tazuna gasped and looked shocked for some odd reason.

"But…Kakashi…it looks like…I'm going to have to kill you first." …Do I really have to tell you that Zabuza said that? _Really? _He vanished and reappeared on the water.

"Over there," Naruto pointed lazily in his direction.

Sakura gasped, "Is…is he walking on water?!"

"Yup."

'_Clever…'_ Kakashi said, tacking on a word that the authoress refuses to include. _'He's built up…a pretty fair concentration of chakra.'_

"The finest of the ninja arts…" Zabuza spoke, disappearing again, "…the Hidden Mist Jutsu."

"He's gone!" Sakura cried.

Our favorite masked ninja turned completely serious, "He will come after me first…Zabuza Momochi…of the Kirigakure Assassin Corps…is a famous master of the art of silent killing. Letting your guard down around him buys you a direct trip to Heaven. I haven't necessarily mastered every aspect of the Sharingan…so all of you stay on your toes!"

…_B-bmp…_

…_B-bmp…_

…_B-bmp…_

"Would you stop that?" Sakura hissed.

Naruto had a look of confusion on his face, "I'm not doing anything!"

"Crap! They're onto us! Run for it!" A shadowy figure ran through the mist into the trees.

A boy about Team 7's age (the Genins, not Kakashi) hurried past the team pushing a large bass drum, "W-wait for me!"

"…"

"…There are eight targets…Throat, spinal column, lungs, liver, the jugular vein, the subclavian artery. Kidney, heart…so many choices…what vital vulnerable place shall I choose? Heh-heh…"

The resident Jonin stood completely still for a moment then quickly set his hands in a ram seal. The rest of the group stiffened as killer intent was released.

Sasuke went pale and began to tremble, _'This terrible blood thirst…! If I draw his attention by even blinking, he'll kill me! I can feel it! I can't stay like this for long! I'm going to lose it.' _He drew a shuddery breath, '_A master ninja, determined to make a kill…knowing my life is in his hands…_I hate it!_ You start wanting to die, just to end the suspense…'_

"Sasuke. Calm down," Kakashi said. "Even if he gets me, I'll still protect you." He looked at his student and eye-smiled, "I will never let my comrades die!"

Zabuza chuckled from somewhere in the mist. "I wouldn't bet on that…" he said landing in the middle of Sakura, Sasuke, Naruto, and Tazuna. "Game over."

The assassin swung his gigantic sword, only to be stabbed in the side by the suddenly appearing Kakashi.

"Watch out!"

Another Zabuza emerged as the clone in front of Kakashi melted into a puddle of water. The eyebrow-less man sliced through the scarecrow, who disappeared.

Zabuza's eyes widened, _'A clone?! He was able to copy me…in this mist?!'_

_**And now a word from our authoress. (a/n Alright, so there's this fic called A New Life by Rokudaime 2000 and it's awesome. So just go on over and click on the story, you won't regret it.) Back to the story.**_

"Don't move…" Kakashi said, a knife to Zabuza's throat, "Game over."

Zabuza smirked, "...Heh heh heh."

"Hee-hee," Sakura giggled, just about to cheer and/or squeal.

"..." Naruto narrowed his eyes, but shouted, "AWESOME!"

"Heh...you think this is over?" The bandaged assassin laughed, "You just don't get it...It'll take more to defeat me then mimicking me like an ape...a _lot _more.

Kakashi stayed silent, not taking his eyes off the the attacker...Actually he didn't even blink! Geez, the ability of those shinobi.

The eyebrowless...man laughed again, "Heh-heh...but you _are _good! In that short time...you copied my Water Clone technique...and by making your clone say something you'd say yourself...You ensured all my attention would be focused on it...while you yourself used the Kiri Technique of hiding in the mist, watching my every move!"

"..." ...What's with Kakashi being so quiet? I mean, I know he's somewhat anti-social, but this is ridiculous!

"Too bad for you..." Zabuza disappeared and reappeared behind Kakashi," I'm not that easy to fool!" The swordsman swung at the scarecrow, who dodged, causing Kubikiribōchō to get caught in the ground. Zabuza pushed off of the sword hilt, swinging toward Kakashi and kicked said Jonin. The Demon of the Mist grabbed his sword and ran toward the (other) masked ninja. '_And now..._' the assassin paused for a split second, glancing down at some objects like jacks strewn across the ground, ' He looked at Kakashi, "Hmff, foolishness!"

Kakashi fell into the water with a splash. Naruto tensed, _'Crap, do I fight or not? I have to do something, but I can't make them suspicious...'_

_'Uh...did Kakashi-sensei...get kicked...all that way?!' _Sakura gasped.

'_His physical techniques are fantastic!' _Really Sasuke? Your teacher just got kicked in the stomach by an assassin and _that's _what you're thinking?

**_(Does anyone else feel like that cut off too abruptly?)_**

**_Ninjas with__ Hats._**

"Gaara!" Haku exclaimed, "What on earth was all that?"

"I'm not sure what you're referring to," the red-head responded innocently.

The poor, gender mistaken boy twitched, "You sunk an entire cruise ship, Gaara!"

The Shukaku container tilted his head, "Are you sure that was me? I-I think I'd remember something like that."

"Gaara, I watched you fire a harpoon into the captain's face!" Haku said exasperated.

"That sounds dangerous."

The supposedly dead ninja growled, "You were headbutting children off the ship!"

Gaara looked away innocently, "That, uh, that must've been horrible to watch!"

"Then you started making out with the ice sculpture!"

"Thank God the children weren't there to see that!" Ah, Gaara, ever the optimist.

Haku glanced at the bottom of the boat, "Uh, Gaara, why is the lifeboat all red and sticky?"

"Well I guess you could say it's red and sticky," the psychopath said, glancing down as well.

"Gaaaaara, what are we standing in?"

Said sand user smiled nervously, "Would you believe it's strawberry milkshake?"

"No," Haku twitched.

"Uh...melted gumdrops?"

"No."

"Boat nectar?

"No."

"Some of God's tears?

Haku sighed, "Tell me the truth, Gaara!"

"Fine," he rolled his eyes, "it's the lovely elderly couple from 2B."

"Gaaaaara!"

The redhead had the decency to look sheepish, "Well, they were, uh, taking all the croissant rolls!"

"I can't believe what I am hearing!" the girly guy growled.

Gaara eye-smiled, "I will not apologize for art."

Haku sighed and looked around. "Where are the other lifeboats?" he asked.

"Whoa! You won the prize! I didn't even notice that."

"Where are the other lifeboats, Gaara?"

His friend/roommate/bane of his existence looked up at the sky, "Looking at the trajectory of the moon and the sun, probably the bottom of the ocean. I bit lots of holes in them."

"GAARA!" Haku rolled his eyes.

"I have a problem. I have a serious problem."

"You are just...terrible today!" the ice-user sighed.

"Shhh..." soothed Gaara, "D'you hear that? That's the sound of forgiveness."

"That's the sound of people drowning Gaara," Haku deadpanned.

The redhead nodded sagely, "That is what forgiveness sounds like, screaming and then silence."

**Arisa; I hoped you all enjoyed it! I'm sorry if it wasn't all that funny, a lot of things have happened and I've been working on some more serious fics...they won't get posted until this one is finished though (or if it's a one-shot)! **

**Syynex; I'm glad you like it, I will!**

**Narutoluver0002; Thank you!**

**Namikaze1200; I'm glad you liked it, I hope you enjoy this one!**

**Guest; Thank you, will do!**

**And thanks to trepicness and others who were probably reviewers for subscribing, alerting, etc. (P.S. I'm really sorry if I got any of your names wrong!)**

**Pleeeeaaaaase review!**

**Arisa out.**


	11. Chapter 8 Akura-ou? What the heck?

**Arisa; Don't own anything! I'd try to make the disclaimer more interesting for those who actually read this little diddy, but I really don't feel like it.**

Normal; BELEIVE IT!

Kyuubi talking; **"BELEIVE IT!"**

Thoughts; '_BELEIVE IT!_

Naruto to Kyuubi; ~BELEIVE IT!~

Kyuubi to Naruto; **-BELEIVE IT!-**

Speech; "BELEIVE IT!"

Time difference; _**BELEIVE IT!**_

Previously on Naruto (think Avatar)_._

_"Too bad for you..." Zabuza disappeared and reappeared behind Kakashi," I'm not that easy to fool!" The swordsman swung at the scarecrow, who dodged, causing Kubikiribōchō to get caught in the ground. Zabuza pushed off of the sword hilt, swinging toward Kakashi and kicked said Jonin. The Demon of the Mist grabbed his sword and ran toward the (other) masked ninja. '__And now...__' the assassin paused for a split second, glancing down at some objects like jacks strewn across the ground, ' He looked at Kakashi, "Hmff, foolishness!"_

_Kakashi fell into the water with a splash. Naruto tensed,_'Crap, do I fight or not? I have to do something, but I can't make them suspicious...'

'Uh...did Kakashi-sensei...get kicked...all that way?!'_Sakura gasped._

'His physical techniques are fantastic!'_Really Sasuke? Your teacher just got kicked in the stomach by an assassin and__that's__what you're thinking?_

_**fIsHcAkEfIsHcAkE**_

Kakashi burst through the surface of the water. '_This isn't normal water…It's dense, heavy.'_

"Ha, fool," Zabuza appeared behind the scarecrow and started doing handseals. "Water Prison Jutsu!"

"No!" the water around Kakashi formed a sphere around the Jonin. '_Well…crap. Escaping through the water? Big mistake.'_

Zabuza chucked darkly, "This prison is made of water, but it's stronger than steel…It's hard to fight when you can't move. So much for the great Kakashi…I'll finish you off later, but first your little friends will have to be eliminated." He formed a Ram handseal with his left hand, "Water Clone Jutsu!"

'_Argh, he's even more skilled than I thought!' _the grey-haired ninja groaned.

Dramatic music started to play, at first soft, gradually getting louder and louder. "The heck!? Where's this music coming from?" Sakura growled, annoyed.

In a place not too far away, Arisa hid in the trees with Conner, Haku, and a CD player, and was getting Haku's autograph.

Everyone decided to ignore the music (which had gotten a little softer) and continue the fight.

A Water Clone of Zabuza rose out of the water and laughed evilly. "You think wearing a headband makes you a ninja? When you've hovered between life and death so many times it doesn't faze you…then you _may_ be called a ninja. When you've become so deadly your profile is entered in my bingo book…then you _may _have earned the title 'ninja'…but to call upstarts like you ninja…is a joke," the assassin spat, shushining away.

'_Crap, where'd he go?' _Naruto looked around warily, only to get kicked in the face by the missing-nin, making his headband fall off.

The clone of the Demon of the Mist stepped on it, "You're just a bunch of brats."

"Naruto!" Sakura cried.

"Grrr…" Kakashi growled. "Listen! Get Tazuna and run! You can't win this fight! He's using all his power to keep me in this prison, so he can only fight you with his Water Clone, but the clone can't go far from his real body. If you get away from him, he can't follow, now run!"

'_Run away? Not an option,' _Sasuke thought determinedly, '_that became unthinkable the moment you got caught…'_

The Uchiha's train of thought was interrupted by a dark chuckle from Naruto. "Run away? Brats? Ha, you wish." The fog started to become thicker until the whiskered blond disappeared.

Zabuza frowned, '_What's that brat up to?'_

"You see, Zabuza…" Naruto's voice called from the mist, getting smoother as he talked. "I'm a bit…different than the average Genin…" The mist lightened, revealing a slightly taller Naruto in a kimono with orange flames, his hair much longer with fox ears sticking out of his head, fangs, and demonic claws. All in all, looking like a fox youkai. He grinned evilly.

Sakura gasped, '_What happened to him?"_

'_Did the Kyuubi take control?' _Kakashi thought uneasily.

"What _are _you?" Zabuza asked. He wasn't exactly scared, but he knew that he'd underestimated the brat.

Naruto laughed, "Some have called me a monster…others: a shinigami…Neither is correct…" He smiled, showing off his fangs, "My name is Akura-ou…brother to the Kyuubi no Kitsune…"

Kakashi's eyes widened, '_Oh crap! The Kyuubi's been feeding Naruto lies! I've got to report this to the Hokage as soon as possible!'_

"…" Zabuza was silent for a moment, then began to laugh, "Nice try kid! As if a punk like you could be the brother of the Nine Tailed Fox."

"Ah…but that's just it…" Naruto purred, "the brat you know as Naruto was never on this mission…Fool is probably still in bed, dreaming of a mission that will never come…It had been so long since I had fun in the Human World that I decided take his place…I hope you don't mind if I play with Zabuza a bit, _sensei._"

"Heh heh…you're very sure of yourself…but do you really think you can stand a chance against me?" the assassin grinned.

"Same goes to you," the blond laughed. He summoned a katana and slashed at the air, creating a gust of wind that destroyed the water clone.

"Heh heh heh…interesting…I guess I've underestimated you…this'll be more fun than I thought…"

The "youkai" rolled his eyes, "You wish…"

"Idiots, get out of here!" Kakashi yelled. "This was over the moment I was captured! Even if you had a chance of beating Zabuza, you don't know what Akura-ou will do! You can never trust fox demons!"

'_Ouch,' _Naruto winced.

**-Sorry brat,' **Kurama rumbled.

~It's fine, Kyu.~ He turned his attention back on the fight. "Ouch, you wound me, _sensei."_ The blond unleashed another gust of wind.

Zabuza laughed, "How's it feel to not be trusted, even by the ones you call teammates?"

"You seem to have forgotten," Naruto said coldly, "I'm not their teammate." He sighed, "This is getting rather boring. Hatake, I'll leave the rest to you." The jinchuuriki threw a senbon at Zabuza's right hand, causing him to release the water prison.

"Argh!" Zabuza swore under his breath. "I'll destroy you!" he yelled pulling out a Fuma Shuriken and spinning it in his hand. He leapt toward Naruto and swung the shuriken downward.

_Clang!_

"Ngh..." Kakashi, having blocked Zabuza's attack, glared up at the former Mist-nin.

"Why do you protect this demon? He said himself that he's not that brat of yours."

"Because, youkai or not, he's an ally, and I never let my comrades die." Kakashi grinned, "Isn't that right...Naruto?"

"Aw..." Naruto groaned in his normal voice, "you couldn't have let me play with him a little longer? You're no fun..."

The scarecrow laughed, "It was an excellent act though, you even had me fooled for a bit."

"What can I say? I'm a great actor."

"Huh?" Sakura frowned.

"Oh, I see..." Sasuke nodded, "Naruto used the mist as an opportunity to henge into that youkai. He then used it to stall Zabuza for a while until an opening appeared so he could free Kakashi."

"Heh, I got distracted and lost my grip on my Water Prison..." Zabuza brushed it off.

"Don't flatter yourself..." Kakashi growled, "you weren't distracted, you were forced to let go!"

"Hmph!"

"Your technique worked on me once...it won't work on me again..." Kakashi continued, "So, what's it gonna be?"

**Arisa; I was going to make it longer...but...I'm lazy. :P On the bright side, I'm pretty sure this is longer than normal so...yeah...bye!**

**Arisa out.**


	12. Another stupid Author's note

**Hey guys, sorry about the lack of updates lately...I've been having a hard time keeping up with this story. It's actually a combination of things, but the truth is, the only reason I started this was because I wanted to upload a fanfic. This was before I had any real ideas of my own and I don't really know where I'm going with this.**

**So, to get to the point, what do you guys think I should do? Rewrite it? Put it on hiatus? Feedback would be greatly appreciated.**

**Arisa**


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